On Adulting

Good luck. Pat on the back. You made it.

Now here’s the secret key that only adults, only the wisest adults know, the ones who make it.

No one knows what the heck is going on only that Something is and a lot of people seem pretty wound up caught in the middle of it.

Make something everyday. A sentence. A smile. A joke (bad ones are the best). A friendship. A choice. (That choice. The first one that came to mind. Make that one.)

Find people places and nouns that support you when you’re not in the room with them. Those nouns are called friends.

Remember: Anyone that speaks badly about another person when the other person is not around will speak badly about you when you are not around.

To want other people to be happy is a noble thing, with one very big oversight. Not everyone wants to be happy. Some people are perfectly content being assholes. They want to be shitheads. Hate. Greed. Crime. … On purpose. Life is survival of the fittest they say. And they’re right, to some degree. Their one mistake is in their definition of fittest.

The better your neighbor does, the better you can do. Our days are built on the backs of each other. What’s best for you is best for everyone because everyone’s best makes a world that’s best for your best.

The fittest help other people be their best because they know that the only way they can ever be their best self is to have what's best around.

To say: “I’m in it for me,” and not help others achieve their best self, well, that’s a close-minded ignorant morally spiritually and emotionally blind human being. Without hyperbole: The cause of every war.

Happy, these days, means a kind of temporary giddy insanity. It’s not. Happiness, the kind Spiritual leaders spoke of throughout history, looks more like Gladness.

Glad is sustainable gratitude. Glad is Happy after he exhales. Glad is slightly better than okay.

Okay is the third hardest thing in the world to feel.

The second hardest is glad to be okay.

The most difficult and best thing to feel is in love and glad to be okay.

Happy’s an accidental surprise. A result and not a destination. Happy happens. Happy is not a planned event. Leave happiness alone. He’ll find you.

There’s no such thing as planned happiness. Okay, we can do. Happy does itself.

Glad is Okay done best. Be glad you’re okay. And when love finds you be glad to be okay for a broken heart, a lifted heart, the loss of the sense the whole world had a moment ago.

And that’s right. A bomb blast-no time-to-explain switch of consciousness. Wits are all that’s left. No time to catch your breath or set a firm foot. Go.

Figure out love as you go. But figure it out together. Find a partner that will figure out together what your love looks like and means every day. Together.

It’s not always joy, but joy always holds it up. Behind the frustration, the insecurity, the disagreements, is joy with the whole of what you make together on each other's shoulders.

Love is what you make together. Two eyes make the picture, two ears the sound, two souls the love.

One soul sucks another dry and puts what they believe love is supposed to be on the relationship on the other.

While the other party agrees, because love is supposed to be about compromise, and so compromise their whole self to the other persons wants.

Each is a vampire. One to control. The other to be controlled. Neither one serves love, both serve themselves. The only victim in love is the love that might have been.